Finished: In Paradise (Matthiessen) Very intense book about a group of people from various countries and religions who go on a five day retreat to Auschwitz in 1996. Catholics, Muslims, Jewish, Protestants, Polish, Americans, British, French, Germans...and the American professor and poet, Clements Olin all converge upon Auschwitz to meet with each other, this group of people who will walk the grounds of Auschwitz and Birkenau. They meet for devotionals and silent prayer groups. They walk the paths that the Jewish prisoners walked. They witness the horrific crematoriums, the bunk houses, the railroad platforms...all with their own reasons for being there. The Jewish people in attendance resent the presence of the two Catholic nuns and two priests. They feel strongly that the Catholic church did nothing to prevent the devastation of the Jews being sent to the prison camps, and in some cases even supplied lists of Jewish citizens to the Nazis. There are bitter words between many...Germans feeling guilty about their ancestors, Poles feeling resentful, Catholics feeling remorse, etc. The Jewish man who was actually a survivor of the camp, like many survivors before him, just comes "home" because he can and he must be there to never forget. Each person there has their own story that comes out in time about what has compelled them to come. Clements Olin has a story all his own. His father, Alexei, was the son of a Polish baron whose parents forced him to leave the military and accompany them to America right before the entitled and educated members of Polish society began to be imprisoned. Alexei felt extremely guilty leaving his country and more importantly leaving behind a young, pregnant school teacher who he'd fallen in love with, Emi. Emi had insisted that he go because she didn't want to leave her own family. In the years during and after the war in America, Alexei mourned for Emi, but never truly went and tried to find her after the war. Having given birth to a son, Clements, and wanting him to be protected, Emi had allowed her baby to be wrenched from her arms and taken to an embassy, and then given to Alexei's family. So...why if they found and kept the baby could they not bring Emi along too? I suppose she refused to go. After being raised in a British private school at a young age, Clements was finally brought to live with his family in America. They were clearly snobs, by his own accounting. As he grew up, all he had of his mother was a single picture of her hanging out a window waving in the Polish town where he was born. Armed with this picture and unsure of his own motives, Clements finally admits to himself that he's there at Auschwitz to try and find out about his mother and see if, as he fears, she was actually Jewish and sent to the camp. He does find this out with the help of some of the very old town folks. So...Clements, who has been brought up as a Christian, finds out that he is actually half Jewish. It all seems to make sense to him then...the reason that his family was always so closed mouthed about his mother....they must have known! They knew that he had Jewish blood and rather than embarrass the family by admitting the taint, they never even investigated to see what had become of his mother. Even his own father, who had professed to love his mother, never tried. Of course, his father had committed suicide at a fairly young age, so perhaps the guilt got to him. Anyway...Clements stands up before the group on the last evening they are there and admits what he's found...that he's part Jewish. He is met with various reactions...but most of all, he's met with his own reaction, which is that of accepting his heritage rather than hiding like his family would have had him do. Another important aspect of the story is that Clements becomes incredibly drawn to Sister Catherine, a novice nun who is struggling, but determined to stay in her faith. She is drawn to Clements as well, but in the end, neither does anything to act on their feelings and they go their separate ways. The entire book was just one powerful, but shattering moment after another. The immensity of standing inside Auschwitz affected everyone almost indescribable by words. This is something I also long to do, and I can't tell the reason why either...just a need to show my respect maybe? And my deep regret. The author tackles such issues as no human being innocent of the atrocity of the death camps...of the horrific murder of an entire group of people. I don't know...it might have gone a bit deep for me...but in all, the book was a good one! I'm always left a bit depressed after reading the books about the Holocaust nightmare, though, which is why I space them out...because I must read them.